The Most Important Question in Your Life
How can I enjoy this?
Whether you are in a fender bender or the death of a family member occurs, there are always ways to extract joy from a situation. Sometimes it doesn’t show itself right away, but it’s there if you have a little patience.
Honesty
Let’s be honest with ourselves. If you realized that you couldn’t feel joy any longer you would probably want to end your life. But you understand the fluctuations that happen and that’s why you are still here, reading this article. You know that the bad things will pass and you’ll be able to start living happy again.
Let’s take a different perspective. Instead of waiting for all the emotions to pass and fade away so you can go back to living, you should consider diving into the moment for all it offers. You can do this by watching your reactions when someone tries to talk to you. Look at how you go about your day to day routines and start noticing all the little details that you are experiencing. Then you will you see the beauty in the situation that you are in, instead of realizing it two days later.
Fear is the reason why we don’t extract the joy from a car accident or the death of a loved one. We are afraid that it might happen again. We are afraid to immerse ourselves in our feelings because of the pain it creates. This fear is healthy, but you should not let it dictate your ability to enjoy life.
Lean into the Fear
Next time you make a joke that no one laughs at, lean into the fear and see what happens. The embarrassing feelings are so unique and intense that you’ll probably wonder why you never took the time to fully experience them before. Then try another joke after a few minutes and see what happens.
Or next time you are frustrated with a co-worker, let the emotions wash over you like a tidal wave. Like every great surfer knows, when you get sucked under by a wave you can’t fight it; you just have to go with it until it lets you up for air.
Every moment becomes an experience instead of something painful. So next time you have intense feelings, ask yourself “How can I enjoy this?” and watch how your brain works to extract joy from the situation.
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Karl @ January 25, 2008