Anger

Emotional Tools for Better Living, Relax and Enjoy

Anger has thousands of pluses and minuses to how it affects your personality, but it’s up to you to use both of them to your advantage. Many people are embarrassed by their anger and are afraid to fully experience it; others are too influenced by its intoxication and they abuse it. When I began to use my anger in order cause positive change, I began to harness its power.

 

“Anybody can become angry, that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way, that is not within everybody’s power, that is not easy.”

- Aristotle

 

My anger used to be self destructive. One night I became so wrapped up in my rage that I crashed my car. As the night continued I became angrier and angrier. The alcohol that was flowing through my veins didn’t help me relax. The negative thoughts were flying around my head that I stopped seeing the rode. A turn that I’ve taken a thousand times snuck up on me and I twisted the wheel, trying too late to compensate, and I flipped my car one and a half times. I let my fury tear me apart.

 

Instead of letting anger do its damage I decided to work with it. Make it into an emotional tool that supported my life and wouldn’t kill me. The single thing that made me the angriest was myself. I saw what I wanted from life and when I didn’t get it I would get pissed off. The anger would turn into sadness then depression would set in. Once I was depressed it would take me weeks to snap out of my funk.

 

Anger has so much energy and power within it that you can use it to motivate you to change a situation or your life. Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi were two of the best examples for using anger in the right way. They never used violence, but allowed the anger to create action. They gathered people and used that anger to lead them to freedom. These two men might be on a grand scale that it’s hard to imagine applying it to your own life, so I’ll show you how I used it.

 

Anger spurred this very book that you are reading right now. I wanted to stop being a victim of my own self created circumstances and do something with my emotions. Whenever I got angry I would write about it – how it made me feel, why did I become angry, and what could I do about it. It spurred me to act upon this intense energy. As I’ve improved my emotional state I’ve been able to harness my anger to motivate me to become a better writer, husband, and friend.

 

If you see your anger as something that’s a negative occurrence, you’re missing out on a great opportunity to use that energy. Next time you feel angry toward your boss, spouse, parent, co-worker, or your child, use that energy to spur positive action. Take a step back, count to five and assess the situation, then figure out a plan of action. Most likely you need to use that anger to improve yourself – make yourself a better artist, a smarter parent, or a more efficient worker. You’ll notice that this action will probably reduce your anger and create a better you. If that doesn’t work then take a stand against the person or thing that caused you to get angry and see if you can come to a better understanding of how to deal with him, her, or it in the future.

 

If it wasn’t for anger we wouldn’t have some of the greatest religions (people who were fed up with the old ways) or the greatest pieces of literature (writers who needed to tell their story so others could learn from the situation that should be avoided in the future).

 

Apply your anger in the right direction and at the right person and you’ll make the changes that are needed to improve your life.

 

What is your favorite moment of how you overcame your anger in a difficult situation?

Popularity: 12% [?]

Karl @ December 24, 2007